Self-knowledge is the ultimate knowledge, and to know yourself is to know the meaning of life. There are millions of things we could know about ourselves, ranging from anecdotal to emotional or psychological matters. There are certain key bits of self-knowledge that we think might benefit us, like our work talents, or a partner who would be compatible with us.
Self-knowledge provides us with a route to a happy and fulfilling life. A lack of self-knowledge makes our lives accidental.
1. Choosing the right partner: We often look at a partner who is kind, attractive or fun to be with. We don’t consider our own neurotic, unbalanced or immature behavior, and how it would affect our partner.
2. Childhood patterns are repeated: Like the ‘bad boy’ syndrome, most of us repeat unhealthy patterns from our childhood unconsciously, going for people who will be miserable for us in ways that are familiar to us.
Without self-knowledge, we are vague about what we want to do with our lives. Money always tends to be an urgent need, and we rush towards jobs that lock us into cages for decades, and we start to believe we are good for nothing, or not cut out for bigger roles.
- SPENDING MONEY UNWISELY
Without self-knowledge, we have hunches on what makes us happy: We wrongly calculate what our purchases, or impulse buys would make us feel. We travel to a certain place and feel disappointed. We buy the latest dress, hoping to look good, but are only surrendering to consumerism. Without knowing ourselves, we cannot spend money in a fulfilling way.
- The unconscious mind performs most of our tasks and even how we behave.
- Our mind is divided into three parts: the primitive the limbic(emotions and memories) and the neocortex (higher reasoning). We are mostly operating from the primitive or emotional parts of the brain, resulting in a lack of self-inquiry.
- There is a natural resistance to unravelling the unconscious into the conscious, as we do not tap into ourselves out of fear of knowing the truth.
- We are not given adequate feedback about our own identity by others, who dislike us or don’t want to hurt us. For example: Friends don’t want to sound impolite or upset us.
- We haven’t lived long enough to realize the importance of self-knowledge, and haven’t tried out stuff to know the difference through experience. Example: While choosing the right career, we are still in a trial-and-error mode, switching from one job to another.
- We are vague in our judgement, and are living life in binary mode, where things are either good or bad, black or white, sweet or sour.
- We aren’t introspecting enough, as we don’t know that we can self-analyse or opt for psychotherapy, unpackaging our thoughts.
- People with self-knowledge are less prone to blame their problem on others.
- They admit to the full extent of responsibility when things go wrong.
- They are less frustrated at work, even though they don’t have the perfect job.
- When problems arise, they don’t panic, as they are in control of the psychological fear, like humiliation, rejection or boredom.
- They are not envious, less stressful, and apologize as soon as a mistake is committed.
- They tend to be great conversationalists and they feel complete within themselves.
In the next article, we shall talk about how to gai more self knowledge!