Toxic Relationships

Human beings like to be emotionally and physically close to each other. As said, “Sharing is caring” life seems better shared. Relationships like most of the things require continuous efforts, even the best of them. After all, nobody is perfect, not your close friends, not your significant other and not even your parents and they also do not see you as perfect. We have to learn to accommodate to the circumstances and adapt to their faults, moods as they do for us. Since we aren’t clones rather individuals, therefore, difficulties are faced in maintaining relationships due to disagreements. Some individuals have to face more difficulties while others do not. But since we value relationships we are determined to uphold it whatever it takes. But some relationships turn toxic, which is characterized by toxic partners who emotionally and not infrequently physically be damaging to their partner. A toxic relationship has the potential, if not corrected to be extremely harmful to the well-being of the individuals. As a healthy relationship contributes to self-esteem and emotional energy a toxic one damages self-esteem and drains the energy. But this doesn’t mean that every toxic relationship is hopeless, they just require substantial and convoluted work in order to be converted into something healthy. A healthy relationship involves mutual caring, respect, compassion, a shared desire for each other’s happiness. In a healthy relationship, one doesn’t fear to be who he/she is, a place to be comfortable and secure, a sanctity. On the other hand, a toxic relationship is demanding, craves insecurity, dominance. One risks losing the very essence of oneself by being in such a relationship. It takes two people for a relationship, so both of them should be examined. Initially, the behavior of toxic one is being noticed but the recipient of the behavior should also be studied. It should be questioned why an adult needs to stay in a relationship that could potentially harm them physically and emotionally? Even a good relationship could have times that could be marked as toxic after all no one is perfect. The toxic partner engages in inappropriate controlling and manipulation on an almost daily basis but paradoxically for the world, they would be exemplar. This behavior is observed in the toxic individual because they want supremacy, crave control, power in his/her relationship. Some types of toxic relationships are-

  • The belitter- Such type of toxic partner would always belittle you, even in front of your friends, family, and even after you confronting him/her that such behavior induces pain in you. They would mock all of your decisions, undermining your self-esteem making you weak emotionally. They would also tell you that you’re lucky to have them in your life, you are unworthy of anything good and should adore whatever you’ve got.
  • The splenetic- Such partners are eager to lose temper in order to feel the power. The recipient ultimately gives up arguing and bowing down to the needs of the partner. You would feel like walking on an eggshell if you have one of such partners. Your partner would blame such behavior on you. The constant vigilance and inability to find out the trigger drains the energy in you, wearing you mentally and emotionally.
  • The degrader- Such partners would induce guilt in you. They can make you feel guilty whenever they feel like or whenever you don’t live up to their expectations. But whenever you do something they like they temporarily remove the guilt which is addictive as a guilt-ridden person only wants the guilt to be removed. Unfortunately, such behavior is used by grownups to control their adult children.
  • The overreactor- It is said that pain reduces when shared but it is not so in case of having a partner who is overreactor. Whenever you try to reach your partner to tell them about your insecurities, problems, they would bring their own problem, and you end up consoling them instead of being consoled. Such behavior adversely impacts your mental well-being because you never get consoled.
  • The maverick- “Noone’s gonna control me” is their sole moto. They are spontaneous and never keep their promise. You can’t even be sure whether they are evasive or committed. This makes the recipient anxious which deteriorates their mental and emotional health.

Since no one is perfect therefore now could see such behavior at some point in the relationship, but this doesn’t mean that the toxicity has crept in. Some things need to work put to keep such behaviors at bay.