Day: May 26, 2021

“Your children are not your children”

Parents often try to steer the life of their children. They decide for their children and make them live according to their wishes. Kahlil Gibran’s poem ‘On Children’ talks about such issues and on proper parenting.

The poem starts with a woman asking a person to talk about children. So the unknown narrator starts of by saying,

  Your children are not your children.

Most of the parents think of their children as belonging to them or think that they own them. But this is a toxic mentality. One can never own a person because people aren’t objects. Every child has his/her own life and it belongs to him/her and no one else. They did come from the wombs of their mothers but that doesn’t mean they are owned by their parents. So, every child has the right to decide and live his/her own life in the way they like.  

They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself.

Because children tend to make mistakes and don’t know the world, they require guidance from their parents. But parents should not use this as an opportunity to impose their preferences and opinions. They should rather support and guide instead of making choices for their children.

You may house their bodies but not their souls,

 For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams. 

Parents may shelter their human bodies and not their souls. Their souls move freely and live in tomorrow. Many parents try to realize their dreams through their children without knowing that it was a past they failed to live and that it is already today, which the children wish to live in. 

 For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.

The poet brings in the comparison parents as bows and children as ‘living arrows’ in the hands of our Creator. The archer, our Creator, sees the mark at an infinite distance. The mark is our death. He bends a bow (a parent) to launch an arrow (a child). When the arrow is shot, the trajectory it takes is defined by the arrow itself. The bow just lends its strength to the arrow to travel. Hence, the parents should make sure that the bow in the hands of the Archer is properly used. The Archer loves both the bow and arrow that serve the purpose properly. 

  The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite, and He bends you with His might that His arrows may go swift and far.

Let your bending in the archer’s hand be for gladness;

  For even as He loves the arrow that flies, so He loves also the bow that is stable.

Thus, the poem provides a valuable lesson on parenting.

‘Life is Fine’ by Langston Hughes.

Sometimes, when people ask us how we are, we would want to bawl our eyes out and say “I am not fine”. But there are also days when we can happily say that we are fine. Such is life with all its ups and downs. 

In the poem ‘Life is Fine’, Langston Hughes deals with a darker theme of taking one’s own life. The first stanza starts with the narrator sitting down by a river bank and trying to figure out something. It  is clear that the poet is worried and is trying to think about it. When he can’t find answers for his problems, he throws himself into the river. This comes as a surprise to a reader at first when one doesn’t know the theme of the poem. 

But instead of drowning, the narrator comes up. He hollers and cries for help. The narrator reasons out that he didn’t die because it was too cold to bear. He seems to have backed out at the last moment. He repeatedly says it was because the water was cold as if trying to console himself. 

I came up once and hollered!

I came up twice and cried!

If that water hadn’t a-been so cold

I might’ve sunk and died. 

  But it was      Cold in that water!      It was cold!

The narrator tries to kill himself for the second time when he is going up in an elevator. He plans to throw himself out of the elevator. Also, readers come to know the reason for his suicide attempts. He is missing someone to whom he refers as ‘baby’.

But he doesn’t jump off the elevator because it is too high. It is quite ironic how the narrator is more concerned about the physical pain caused by death. Readers also come to understand the vulnerable mindset of the narrator. It is obvious the narrator is suffering and is in pain.

I stood there and I hollered!

I stood there and I cried!

If it hadn’t a-been so high

I might’ve jumped and died.

In the concluding stanzas, the narrator complies with reality and decides to go on living. He decides to live simply because he was born to live. He could have died in place of his beloved, but he can’t because he was destined to live his life.   

So since I’m still here livin’,

I guess I will live on.

I could’ve died for love—

But for livin’ I was born

While he continues to live on, he might suffer and cry. He may have more painful experiences, but he is resolute to live. He is earnest to live. He assures his beloved that he will live and not die.   

Though you may hear me holler,

And you may see me cry—

I’ll be dogged, sweet baby,

If you gonna see me die.

He ends the poem with the line,

Life with all its pain and suffering may appear fine when we are resolute to live on. We may go through hard times, but it may not appear hard when we live on. When we grow old, we understand what to cling onto in life and what to leave behind. Thus, this poem which starts with a gloomy theme ends with an optimistic message that life is fine as long as we continue to live. So, let’s live.

    Life is fine!      Fine as wine!      Life is fine!